2004 / November 23^rd/ Designing under stress

I’m starting to feel a bit like Ryan Sims over here - apologizing for not updating, but hey - it happens. I can only hope that my beloved readership of 5 people can understand. In any case, I can almost see a break ahead, but not quite yet. I plan on doing some major work either on this site, or some other personal ventures during Christmas break. I’ll only have work to do - so I should have some extra time on my hands here all alone at home (anyone want to come visit SLO?).

Speaking of stress, I’ve found something interesting that I think Zeldman kind of hinted at the other day. I kind of see myself in the same shoes as Zeldman - at least when it comes to design. Design is something I like to do, I’d like to think I?m better than most at it - but I definitely know I’m not the cream of the crop. I’ve found that my creativity takes a major dive while I’m under stress. Bad news. Recently I tried to come up with a design and found the creative juices that used to be there were sucked up dry.

Luckily, I had a rare break this weekend and got some time to relax, sleep, play some poker, sleep, and get out to play some much needed Frisbee golf. Thank god for this weekend. I also found that after I had some time to relax suddenly designing came easier. I came up with a concept that wasn’t thrown into the trash immediately. A little bit of green here, a little white space there and I’ve finally got a Photoshop mockup that doesn’t suck. Awesome.

This is also another reason my blog hasn’t been updated in a while. I’ve just been so damn busy with school, work, and keeping up with friends to even think about relaxing. So then I sit down, look at my dwindling traffic numbers for my site and realize I need something new up there. So I sit down, open up Microsoft Word and stare at a blank screen for a bit. Maybe music will help - so I search through some of my new favorite music, put on some Garden State soundtrack and think about what I should write. Pretty soon 30 minutes has passed and it?s now 2am - I’ve got to be up in 5 hours. So, I put it off, and the cycle repeats itself.

So I’ve realized that trying to be creative is useless when I’m under undue stress - whether it be impossible finals or a week-past deadline at work. I think this is why I’d never be able to be a designer for a living. You give me a layout to code when I’m stressed out and I’ll get it done - maybe make a few small mistakes I normally wouldn’t, but no big impact. You give me a complicated failure problem and it’ll get done. Ask me to come up with an awesome design and I sit there and stare. Of course, the inability to design also creates anxiety and it builds until I am useless for the rest of the day.

I give massive props to the design fellows at my work - because they seem to be able to do this constantly. They come in, work 60 hour weeks and come out with 5 amazing design comps as well as their regular work. I could never do that. But then again, perhaps that’s why I’m more code oriented. Maybe that’s why I’m an Engineer. Maybe that’s why I’m a Web Producer. I enjoy what I do, and I never have to worry about just ‘loosing’ the creative juices and being out of work. That?s the risk you take being an artist - whether it be designer, musician, or poet.

1. 

   richard

   November 23^rd | #

   Hi Kyle, I did a search for “SLO” at IceRocket.com this morning and found this post at the top of the list. The title caught my attention, so I opened it up. It wasn’t until then I realized it was your blog.

   I could really identify with the feelings you shared. I’m definitly much more of a coder than a designer and am in awe by artists that apparently keep the creative juices flowing without interuption - even under pressure.

   However, what I think you’d find in a discussion with them is that they feel they’re not producing their best either when under stress. It’s just that their subpar designs exceeds our best attempts… Nothing to be discouraged by - just part of learning about where our own strengths lie.

   It took me until my mid-thirties to realize that my own strength was working very quickly while maintaining attention to detail. When I was learning how to program, I was consistently the first in my class to submit my programs for compile and for the first 5 weeks of school never even had a single compile error. I finally learned that it was even faster to make a few mistakes, let the compiler find them, then fix them.

   As a submarine reactor operator in the Navy, I challenged myself to be the fastest onboard to complete a “pre-critical checkoff” before starting up the reactor - without making any mistakes. I completed in 4 hours what took most 5-6 hours - without a single error.

   Anyway, this strengh along with being organized and a good people person (who respected those around me with greater technical and design skills) took me in the direction of management. The detail-oriented skills came in very handy as the “scale” of the projects grew. Only recently did I leave that path due to burnout to start over and try something new - web design.

   I wouldn’t be surprised from the little I’ve learned of you, if you take a similar path - whether in web development or civil engineering (it’s all the same stuff from a management perspective).

   You’ll be a good “doer” in either career and naturally rise to the top due to being so well-rounded. It is just as valuable in a team environment to have well-rounded members as it is to have members who are extremly talented in their specialty. Those who run the show are usually the well-rounded ones who have learned to respect the superior talent of those around them and know how to harness it.

   You’ve got a promising career ahead - just learn to pace yourself to avoid burnout. You’ll find that you can contribute even more by working less hours and maintaining time for other “renewing” pursuits.

   fwiw, rb

2. 

   Kyle

   November 24^th | #

   Thanks for the kind words Richard. Always nice to hear things like that about yourself :)

   Don’t worry, I’m planning on taking some time off more or less - and I always keep some time for personal projects so I don’t go insane. Next quarter I’ll have a lot more extra time on my hands that will be well earned.

3. 

   Aaron

   November 24^th | #

   Hi Kyle,

   Your latest blog post hits a note with me also. I work for a company which relies on me to come up with 90% of the design works for sites and nearly 100% of the coding. Now im nowhere near a great designer but i know when i turn designs in that they could be so much better if i wasnt under the stress and constraints placed upon me. Its hard to submit something you feel could be better!

4. 

   Georgios

   December 7^th | #

   Nice!

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